It's Official: Your Roku Box Is the Work of the Devil

AP Photo/Patrick Sison, File

I don't mean to literally compare a simple Roku streaming box to Satan, genocidal Islamic organizations, Communism, or the new owners of Hostess who didn't restore Twinkies to their original size. Clearly, these are works of an actual devil in ways that Roku is not.

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But I do mean to ask — and with all the frustration implied by the headline of this column — what does a man have to do to get a little peace from the ads plastered nearly everywhere?

The details are a bit technical and were uncovered a few days ago by Janko Roettgers of Lowpass. He discovered a new patent filing by Roku that uses "frame analysis and HDMI detection," as Tom's Guide put it, to determine when the content displayed on your television via those ubiquitous HDMI cables is paused.

"What's the big deal?" you might ask. The deal was supposed to be that we'd watch ads if the content was free, but we'd get no ads on the content we paid for. Companies like Roku (and Amazon) are breaking the deal.

Thanks to Roku's pending patent, someday soon the devices plugged into your TV will know when you've paused the show, the movie, or your Xbox game.

And then they'll plaster your pause screen with ads.

Tom's Guide also noted that "this patent would allow Roku TVs to show ads even when the input is changed — something that no other TV manufacturer has proposed in the past."

The system is pretty sneaky. "The technology described would detect whether content was paused in multiple ways—if the video being displayed is static, if there's no audio being played, if a pause symbol is shown anywhere on screen, or if (on a TV with HDMI-CEC enabled) a pause signal has been received from some passthrough remote control," according to Ars Technica

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Worse, for people like me who still have privacy concerns, the patent would give Roku "another source of user data that can be used to encourage advertisers to spend on its platforms."

"Another source of user data" roughly translates to "Roku has more of your private information to sell to advertisers."

I'm the first to admit that just because Roku has filed a patent for the technology to plaster your pause screen with ads, doesn't mean they'll do it. But when the company says, as it did in its 2023 financial statement, that "future growth depends on the acceptance and growth of streaming TV advertising and advertising platforms," then you have to peg the odds at somewhere north of 98%.

It's been more than 30 years since I first saw ads appear on gas pumps, and I figured the end was nigh. The explosion of cable and then TiVo and Netflix gave me hope that we'd beaten back the TV advertising beast, but those days are over.

The patent doesn't apply to "stick" devices that plug directly into your TV's USB ports. However, it's safe to assume that the devilish engineers at Roku are busy trying to figure out how to do that, too. 

The only remaining question is how long before Americans are willing to give up just a little more privacy and get a slightly cheaper TV, if we'd just acquiesce to banner ads placed during our shows?

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Oh, wait — Vizio started doing that to customers last year.

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